Shirt open, paramedics on site, paddles charged - CLEAR!
Thankfully, I'm not THAT kind of "clear" - sorry if I freaked you out (but I'm feeling much better today, so cockiness rules).
A LONG time ago, I noticed that at times, my heart would skip beats. Just one here, one there. Then one day when I was getting over a flu, it happened a lot and for a long time. Pair that with my life-long history of fainting and I was worried something was up. Months later, I finally got to see the cardiologist who reviewed my file. More time on the ECG, more discussions, and the end result is that I'm clear of anything harmful. I do have Type I second-degree atrioventricular block, it's somewhat common, completely benign, and (surprisingly) more likely to occur when you are involved in endurance sports. But all tests and recordings indicate that there's nothing pathological there, and nothing to worry about.
I'm clear, and I've been formally cleared to continue with endurance sports.
I am very happy with this knowledge, but I'm still somewhat wary. Perhaps that's not the right term, but I'm certainly not going to ignore these skips in the future. I won't let them hinder me like I did in the past (human hearts are not redundant so I erred on the safe side) but I will note when they occur and their frequency. Should anything abnormal be noticed, it's back to the doctor.
But even in saying that, I feel a different approach lurking in my mind, one that can't wait to belt it out on the road, or in the pool, or doing hill repeats, or track work. I'm feeling ready to push hard and move ahead towards Ironman Mont Tremblant...and whatever lies beyond that.
This inner drive is also rising from the messy ashes of all my regrets from last week. I don't want to get into more details on that (I'm sure that last post was weird enough), but I do feel like I'm on the right path with that as well. I feel success can be found, and that this is all a bump in the road...even if it's a big one.
This morning, I finally cleared my head completely - the first time in weeks - by hitting the pool. Scott and I signed up for masters swimming which is coached by Greg at Bytown Storm. It's too early in the morning to think clearly (I was up at 4.30), and when you finally wake up fully, you're pool side and these guys are serious. I focused on nothing but swimming and form for nearly 90min today. The stress was gone, and I loved the feeling of the water as I cut through it - it's been months since I've swam and I forgot just how good it feels. I was working hard, but also working hard on working smart - swimming improves more with good form and technique than with shear brute force - and it set the tone for the rest of the day.
I'm feeling happy today, and relaxed. And it's nice.